Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Today I gonna write in english version
because my hometown computer cannot type mandarin. =.=

Recently
I'm s0 emo-ING

felt helpless
heart broken

final is coming soon and I have to do my assign
but my laptop got so much problem

Sometimes, I wish I can easily to cry
drop few tears, release my stress

but I know I'm not that type of person like to cry.

but I can felt my tears when I totally lost of my mind...

I like to laugh with everyone if compare to cry alone.

Recently I always show my BLACK-faces to my friends
I also dunno how to control my feeling already.
Sometimes I just want to be alone to emo, but I don't really like that.


****


Last year, my grandma passed away.
she just passed away last two week, if not mistaken.
If looking back her place where she slept
what I'm thinking.... I also dunno....

my eldest sister more closer with my grandma all the times
I hope she will getting better and take times to forgot the pain.

maybe I'm a bad grand-daughter...
I'm a weird kid, dunno how to respect people when I still a kid.
Even teenager life I also a weird person.

Maybe this kind of personality, I didn't really much care about my family.

but who knows my pain when I'm alone most of the times?

before my grandma passed away one week before
luckily I stayed at home for week...
to look after her...

thanks to her whatever she done for me and my siblings as well...

maybe I not really talk much with her
I dun really understand my grandma so much...

I not the type of person like to talk

a person who always hide true feeling inside my deepest side...

I like to laugh always
so that I can reduce my dark side.



**sorry if got a lot of broken english =.=



for GAKUTO-san
I really like your voice so much~
I always listening your voice when I'm in bad mood

I never like a idol until like this
always talk about idol, listening and repeating the song all the times
and draw the portrait =D

If I getting marry, IF possible...
I will use GACKT's song (Loveletter) as my theme song. =D
(Kimi Ni Aikute) meaning is I want to see you
I think I will use that song also? LOLx

He shows his tender a lot with this love song.
that's the part I like GACKT-san so muchhhhhHHHH.
I will never forgot him till the end....

but the most important part
GACKT-san's voice heal my my broken heart when the one I like ignored me that time
hahahahahahahahahHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAA

seem crazy?
but this is the reason I like GACKT-san until today
lalalala~~~

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